As you're approaching the start of your freshman year, you might feel anxious thinking about your future roommate(s). I’ve been in your shoes — growing anxious whenever I came across a freshman roommate horror story and praying I’d secure a single. Instead, I’ve been blessed with a best friend that made me thank the universe for not answering my prayers. To make this your reality, here are a few things that will help you build a relationship with your roommate.
1. Spend time with your roommate(s) and get to know them
Don’t be shy to make the first move and plan an activity with your roommate. If you don’t know where to start, my suggestion is going over your answers from the housing application. They made great conversation starters on me and my roommate’s first FaceTime call and we kept jumping from topic to topic. It also allowed us to bring up some of the expectations we had of each other, which ultimately made me less anxious about sharing a room with someone.
After this, make some effort to further develop your relationship with your roommate. You don’t have to be best friends with them, but building a decent companionship will make your freshman year a lot easier. Consider creating a Pinterest board to plan how you will decorate your room, socializing with each others’ friend groups and grabbing meals together.
2. Don’t be afraid to communicate and set boundaries
You and your roommate will annoy each other rather often in the first couple of weeks, especially if you’ve never shared a room with someone before. Although this is normal, in order to prevent little irritations from turning into hatred towards your roommate, inform them if their behavior bothers you and be open-minded if they come forward with a similar concern.
Even though my roommate and I got along quite well, we still had several small-scale disagreements. Yet, we managed to resolve every single one of them by having conversations and finding mutually beneficial solutions. This process taught me that coming clean about your boundaries early on will allow your roommate to more smoothly adapt to them.
Two ways to achieve this are sharing your schedule with your roommate and thoughtfully filling out the Roommate Agreement Form that your Resident Advisor will give you after move-in. I have to admit that my roommate and I had way too much fun filling it out as we couldn’t help but give silly responses and laugh. Still, these are great ways to make your roommate aware of the times you’ll be in the room and how you can harmoniously share your living place.
3. Connect over common interests
Our shared passions carried us from tolerating one another to truly enjoying each other’s company. Once we realized that we both preferred to listen to music without headphones, we decided to create a Spotify Blend and played that whenever we were in the room together. I showed her my favorites from Cage the Elephant and she introduced me to Steve Lacy. Whenever I listen to Some, I remember my roommate and cherish the days we’ve spent together.
Once we found that starting point, we connected over a lot more: gossip sessions, study dates, sushi nights... As an international student who was thousands of kilometers away from her hometown, making the best out of having a roommate freshman year made me feel more at home than I’ve probably ever felt. I sincerely hope that these tips will help you and allow you to turn your freshman roommate into a lifelong friend.
Buse Koldas is a sophomore from Istanbul, Turkey majoring in Chemical and Biomolecular Engineering and Computer Science. She is the Voices Editor and was previously the Social Media Manager and a Staff Writer for The News-Letter.
