Just getting out of a relationship? Been on the single track for a while? I hear you. You spend endless nights on the prowl for "the one"; however, no one's ever told you that it's okay to be single. In fact, you can enjoy life as a bachelor or bachelorette no problem, because once you're committed, it's game over.
Just kidding!
Single life is just as much of an adventure as life in a relationship. The only difference is that it's an adventure with yourself. It's a chance to devote yourself to your wants and your needs because taking care of yourself should be your number one priority. Here are a few simple improvements you can make to your life while you're still single.
Connect with the rest of humanity. All that time spent brooding over being single could have been spent catching up with friends and family. As Hopkins students, our schedules are busy enough that we can barely manage a few friendships without devoting what time we have to looking for a date.
Better yourself by bettering your lifestyle. Trade in those Jimmy Choos for a pair of jogging shoes and stop spending money at Chipotle and eat a salad. A little time spent taking care of our bodies and minds can do us good. And whatever you do, don't underestimate the importance of breathing! It only takes three long (about 8 seconds) breaths to restore oneself.
By "restore" I mean regain that which was once lost: neutrality. Recover from fear of the outside world, anxiety, thoughts of desolation and battle the dragon within. I'm starting to sound like an old Tai Chi master. (Disclaimer: I most certainly am not.)
Adopt new hobbies. If you're putting your heart into something, you might find there is more to life than eternal partnership. Find your passion and indulge, indulge, indulge. Unless studying is your highest avocation, then (by default) I highly doubt you spend enough time on developing your skills outside of what is strictly academics.
A close friend of mine once said "Now that we're broken up, what am I going to obsess over?" And that's when I realized what she needed: a distraction! So I said to her "How about a new hobby?" And the very next week she was applying various make-up products to the faces of dead woodland creatures. Now that that little anecdote is over, get to painting, croqueting, rowing, sewing, whatever!
Document your life by keeping a journal. It sounds incredibly cliché, but five or ten years from now, when you're looking back on your college years, it'd be nice to have some vessel of your old self. Tom Riddle-style.
Your thought processes five years from now will probably be as drastically different as they were five years ago and reading your old journal you might find yourself an entirely different person, in a positive way, of course. What better feeling than the satisfaction of knowing how you've grown as an individual in every way possible?
But besides all that, keeping track of your thoughts might help you maintain some level of sanity. In this crazy world we live in, preoccupied with stress brought by midterms, essays and lack of sleep, writing down your thoughts can be relieving.
Create a list of "favorites." Favorite bands. Favorite authors. Favorite hors d'œuvres. Favorite people. The list can go on and on. Watch as your list grows and develops as your taste evolves. Kind of like how people read the first three installments of Twilight, got to Breaking Dawn, and burned the entire series on their dad's gas grill. Or maybe that was just me.
Anyway, investing in what you like is healthy. It shows great self-esteem and boosts self-confidence. When you feel like your opinion matters, you feel like you matter. However, your mileage may vary. Indecisive people should stay far, far away from this one.
Engage in intelligent conversation. Brush-up on current events and go talk to somebody about them. We all secretly wish to one-up each other in an intellectual argument. Don't try to deny it. We're Hopkins students; we eat, breathe and live competition. So go read an article on a feminist blog or something. Then get in a heated altercation. Just make sure to keep the peace.
Whatever beef you may have, it's not worth perpetuating the violence. And don't give me the lame excuse that you don't know what to talk about. There's so much going on in the world right now. The Penn State scandal. The presidential race. Gaddafi's son. SNL.
To all my single people, I hope you feel well-equipped to take on the world in an entirely different way. No more are the days spent scouring the earth in search of love. No more will the woeful background music, the soundtrack of your life, haunt your every step.
Today, you are single. Today, you are free. I leave you with this quote: "The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready."
