It's that time of year again.
No, not Thanksgiving. Not Christmas, either. Not Hanukkah, not Kwanzaa. So far, all your guesses are wrong.
Breaking Dawn, the 4th and final installation in the Twilight series, premieres in America (Land of the Great and Bloody-fanged) this Friday, Nov. 18. Please don't assume this information means I'm urging you to go see this no-doubt awful movie.
In case you were wondering or living under a blissful rock this past, like, decade, Twilight is that book-to-movie series in which a pale, emotional teenage girl commits necrophilia with a pale, emotional but blood-sucking corpse.
There are other plot points that include super hot but jailbait werewolves, racial (read: vampire-werewolf-human) tensions, something about Rome, sex, pregnancy, and really, really, really pedophilic werewolf luvin'.
All this in a single young adult series by some woman named Stephanie Meyer? Oh yes.
In any case, the whole franchise has made a buttload of money off of some dudes named Rob Pattinson and Taylor Lautner.
No one knows if the female lead, Kristen Stewart, has helped the movie franchise make money.
As long as we're being honest here, I suppose I'll have to admit that I will most likely be forking over that $10 to see this terrible hack of a film.
I don't know if I can defend myself in any way, shape or form, except by saying that I'm totally curious about how they're gonna pull off the vampire-baby-bursting-from-Kristen-Stewart's-uterus part.
Hooked?
Yeah, you, me and everyone else who mistakenly picked up the first book way back in 2005.
