The art of losing and the athlete

The Hopkins men's lacrosse team's first loss was a major downer for me. I had hoped the Blue Jays would fulfill my hopes for an undefeated season, redeeming the lack of one from my New England Patriots, but it appears that there will be no zero in the loss column this year.

The Blue Jays' disappointing game this weekend got me thinking about the art of losing. In a team sport like lacrosse, the blame can be laid on any one player who steps onto the field. Someone could have netted an extra goal. Someone could have blocked an extra shot. Someone could have won an extra face-off.

I recalled Al Pacino's speech at the end of Any Given Sunday, where he says, "Either we heal, now, as a team, or we will die as individuals."

When a team loses, its players help each other heal together. But what about those who step on the playing field alone?

Individual sports such as wrestling or tennis have to do what they do by themselves. They have teammates who will train with them or cheer them on during a match, but when they're in the middle of their battle, there's not a whole lot a team can do for them.

They're either going to win or they're going to lose, and the thrill of victory or the burden of defeat falls on their shoulders and theirs alone. The pressure is enough to make some athletes crumble.

"Losing in an individual sport is a lot worse than losing in a team sport because you have no one to blame but yourself," junior wrestler Tyler Schmidt said.

"When I lose, I don't make excuses for it. It's all part of the process. That means I wasn't prepared enough. That in itself is probably more hurtful than anything else. You can't make excuses. You just lost because you got beaten."

For many individual athletes, a loss is key to their development in the sport. There aren't very many Cael Sandersons out there, who can go undefeated throughout their career.

Losses develop the athlete. He learns from his mistakes, makes changes, and works harder to make sure that they don't happen again.

"When I was in high school I was a lot more discouraged about losses and considered myself not up there with those players, when really it's just a matter of a few points," sophomore tennis player Dave Maldow said.

"As I grew up and got through college and started appreciating the sport a little more, you come to realize that losses are necessary in order to win."

"You have to look back on losses, why you lost, and think about how you need to improve to beat that person next time."

One can't ignore pressure as a major factor in individual sports. When a wrestler steps on the mat, a tennis player takes the court or a fencer enters the strip, the spotlight is on him.

He knows that if he wins, he will be the one raising his hand in victory.

It was his individual effort in practice, his hard work and dedication to the sport that brought him the win.

However, on the opposite end of the spectrum, a loss becomes the inverse of that.

He didn't work hard enough. He made mistakes. He wasn't as good. I can remember nothing as emotionally devastating as losing a match in front of my team when I wrestled in high school.

When an athlete steps into his field of play alone, the fear of loss becomes a major factor. It can often be the only factor.

I was sitting around with a few of my old college wrestling teammates this weekend when one of them said to another, "You're more afraid to lose than you are driven to win." This summed it up perfectly.

When an athlete faces an opponent that he knows can be beaten, the agony of loss far outweighs the glory of victory.

However, should these losses be forgotten in favor of moving on, or do all of an athlete's losses serve as valuable learning experiences?

"I think it varies," Schmidt said.

"Some matches I do just forget and move on. For the most part, you should forget about them until the next day. Then you should start considering them and analyzing them and probably over-analyzing them if you can, because those are the losses you learn the most from."

"Forget in the short-term and remember in the long-term."

There's a Confucius quote I actually first saw on the back of a wrestler's T-shirt that has stuck with me my entire life.

It read, "Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in getting up every time we do."

The fall may hurt. It reminds the athlete of his weakness, what he still needs to accomplish, but it's what he does afterwards that truly matters.