In a neighborhood as touristy as Little Italy it is very hard to find a restaurant worth eating in.
Generally, restaurants in tourist-driven areas do not have to try to cultivate regulars; in other words, once you're at the table, they don't have an incentive to make you want to come back.
For this reason, most restaurants in Little Italy specialize much more in their restaurant's signs, in the decor and in the graphic design of the menu posted outside the restaurant than they do on the quality of the food.
When a restaurant such as this pays any attention to the quality of what it serves, the goal is not to make good and interesting food but rather to make food that will not offend its diverse patrons.
The goal of the typical restaurant in Little Italy is to produce food that will work for a tired tourist family that doesn't believe in seasoning.
This neighborhood makes the task of finding decent food almost impossible. Almost.
There are, however, a few restaurants that are capable of making good food in this district.
Generally the different approach that these places take is reflected in exterior decor. Moreover, by observing a few simple rules, it is possible to separate the wheat from the chaff and find good food in Little Italy.
First off, beware of the neon sign. The goal of incandescent lighting is to impress people who've never heard of the restaurant, who don't know where to look for real food and who don't care to make an effort to find it.
A neon sign outside a restaurant is what happens when a restaurant cares more about appearance than the quality of its food.
Second, notice a restaurant's grammar. No matter the language, and particularly when crossing languages, a sign outside a restaurant should use correct grammar. The worst sign in Little Italy is outside the worst restaurant in Little Italy. The sign reads "Amici's, a very casual Italian eatery."
While there are numerous problems about this sign, for now, let's cover the grammar issue. "Amici's" is both Italian and English. It's not a proper name, and there is no person called Amici. Insead, amici means "friends."
So "Amici's" really means "friends's," which doesn't make any sense.
A restaurant that would hang such a sign outside clearly does not contain a staff with the brains or the raffined taste necessary to construct a decent sign.
What does that make you think about the food? Don't bother trying it -- in this case, it's not worth the bother.
Third, pay attention to the people in the restaurant's line. Look to see if there is a line outside the restaurant.
It's not politcally correct to judge people by their appearances, but when choosing a restaurant, sometimes it just can't be helped; many times it is a quick and easy way to judge a restaurant.
If anyone waiting to eat at the place you're considering has a Hard Rock Caf5f T-shirt on, have dinner somewhere else. There are other bad signs too, like New Jersey hair, long nails, fanny packs, "I Love Baltimore" shirts and other clues of the sort.
Remember, if it seems as if the only people who want to eat there are tourists, you do not want the food to pass through your lips.
The fourth thing to keep in mind is that the menu posted on the front of a restaurant should have some strange dishes on it.
This is not just a recommendation for the adventurous eater intent on consuming squid ink ravioli.
Rather, the mere presence of squid ink ravioli shows character in the chef.
Putting that sort of thing on the menu means that the chef cares about making good food. It means that you'll see better quality in everything, including a simple pasta dish with tomato sauce.
Once a restaurant has passed these tests, and you have decided to venture in, you can be further encouraged if the decor is drab, the walls are covered in hokey approximations of fresco, and the menu is printed in only one color. In addition, if the place is half-full, and the service is exceptional, you're in for a good meal.
The restaurant that can stay open despite a dark and unfriendly exterior, despite a practically invisible sign and an ugly dining room, must really be able to cook. This sort of restaurant can attract regulars.
Gemano's Trattoria is the perfect example of this type of restaurant.
The people that wander in to Germano's do so for a reason other than its facade or decor.
Germano's various brands of bruschetta, their squid ink ravioli, their firm distinction between primo and secondo and, most of all, their gnocchi, make it a first-rate restaurant.
The real gems of Little Italy, however, are not limited to restaurants. If you look hard enough you will find a single bakery that knows the power of pig and a deli that makes its own sausage.
Now that you know how to find a good eatery, you may even try your hand at locating one of Baltimore's hidden gems on your own. Just remember that a well kepty secret is meant to remain just that.
