I've wanted to get a tongue piercing ever since I turned 21. However, my boyfriend is very against the idea. He says that tongue piercing "looks trashy" and can also cause health and dental problems. I tell him that it could improve our sex life, but he doesn't care. What should I do?
You're a big girl and this is your tongue -- you have the right to get a hole in it if you want to, and your boyfriend only knew the pleasures that were coming to him, you might find him quickly changing his tune (to a moan). However, there are some definite pitfalls to a tongue piercing that you might not have thought about, which is where your boyfriend's objections are coming from. Trashy looks and tongue infections are no doubt the big tongue ring turnoffs; however, appearance and hygiene are things you can control. Of more importance, people wouldn't go through all the pain, swelling and mouthwash if their life was going to get worse: You're right -- a tongue ring is one more step towards making your sex life a whole lot hotter. Personally, I can think of better places on your body to explore for this goal ... but let me first dispel your boyfriend's tongue ring trepidations.
People worry about the medical issues more than they have to. I hope (and so would your boyfriend) that if you decide to get a piercing, especially in your tongue, you are smart enough to go to a clean place that uses sterile instruments. Past that, as long as your piercing is in the center of your tongue and is perpendicular to it, there should be minimal problems with your gums and teeth. This is not to say that problems with teeth and gums aren't more likely when putting a metal foreign object in your mouth, but I promise, you're just not going to keep it in long enough to have any long term problems.
As far as hygiene and upkeep, this is really more your issue: It's a pain and you have to keep that thing spotless, not to mention forgo a lot of favorite pastimes for a while. These include (at least the first couple of days) smoking (although not a good idea anyway), hot foods, alcohol and kissing -- all types (OK, so your boyfriend might not like this). Antibacterial mouthwash might become your new best friend. After this, you honestly might not even want the thing anymore.
Your boyfriend's issues with "looking trashy" actually present a better argument than the health issues. Very few things say to guys "I like giving head" quite like a tongue piercing. As small as it is, the little knob on a tongue ring is notorious for adding electrifying texture to the tongue. Guys love it and figure if you have a ring, you love it, too. That's where the "trashy" image comes in. However, you can address this by making it less visible during the day by changing the size and color/material of the bar and ball. As long as you're subtle about having one, I don't think your boyfriend's concerns about looking trashy should stop you. Plus, you can take the piercing out at any point, and most people I've known rarely last more than a year or two with one, anyway.
Now I'm talking like I might have some personal experience with this -- sorry, my tongue never did anything that bad to me to deserve a hole in it.
This knowledge is derived from the lessons learned and benefits reaped from a former boyfriend. Our positions were actually reversed from yours. I had problem with tongue piercings on girls, but I thought it would be a great idea for my boyfriend to get one. For my 18th birthday, I got my wish -- and it vibrated. So I know: your sex life is definitely going to get a kick-start out of this.
Basically, your boyfriend might want a trial period before he gives his final verdict. However, he is still not feeling it (literally) or is just too grossed out, there are some pretty good alternatives -- and you get more of the benefit this time.
Think south, and in some cases way south. A couple of friends of mine can attest to the benefits (and some pitfalls) of nipple and "clit" piercings. To me those are hotter than a tongue piercing ever will be because they still will increase your kicks, but they're for you -- not everyone who watches you eat.
